The Haps

27 06 2012

Look. There’s no easy way to say this. I’ve got shitloads of stuff cooking and I want you to know about all of them. What’s unusual for me is that I’m actually proud of these things. They’re things I spent time and love on, made sacrifices for and so on, so the fact that they’re all happening now… well…I just want you to know about them.

Scratch that. That isn’t what I want. What I want is for you to love them so much that you sell everything you own to fund the building of an enormous sign that tells people how much you love me, but until then… I’ll settle for you just knowing about them.


The series that I host on Radio 4 ‘My Teenage Diary‘ returns to Radio 4 this Wednesday at 6.30pm.

It’s basically people reading from the diary they wrote when they were teenagers (hence the title) but they turn out to be incredible shows because they’re basically the origin stories of people in the public eye (For non-comic book geeks, an origin story is like ‘How/Why Bruce Wayne became Batman’). They’re normally funny and sad and interesting and sometimes so touching that I cry. This has happened twice now. Once, when Sheila Hancock talked of finding teenage love during a post-war trip to France and secondly when I talked to Robert Webb. Well, that’s the show that we kick off the new series with. After that we’re bringing you the youthful rememberings of Caitlin Moran, poet Jackie Kay, Toby Young, Rhona Cameron and Children’s Laureate/Gruffalologist Julia Donaldson. Each of these six were fantastic to record, so I hope you give them a go.


I made a new panel show in January and ITV liked it so much that they wanted to wait for the perfect time to put it on rather than rushing it out. It’s called Mad Mad World and it starts this Saturday at 10pm on ITV1. Hosting we have Mr Saturday Night – Paddy McGuiness, Team Captains are me and Flight of The Conchords hero Rhys Darby and joining me every week is the every bubbly Mr Rob Rouse. It’s a silly, funny saturday night kind of show. If you like those, hopefully you’ll really dig it.

Funny clips from all over the world, interspersed with us dickbags making jokes about them.

Also, I’m about to host the pilot of a show provisionally titled Mash Da Mind (but I’ll be cold and dead if it’s called that if we get a series). If you’ve got a gang of four mates and fancy being on it, they’re doing a huge casting call up in Leeds. Details here. I can’t tell you too much about it, but the whole reason I wanted to do Entertainment TV was to try and re-invent it, to do something that hadn’t been seen before. Remember how exciting it was when you first watched Don’t Forget Your Toothbrush? Well, that’s what I want to do on TV. Something that isn’t just a version of something else. Well, the stuff we’re talking about doing in this show is DEFINITELY that πŸ™‚



The movie that I made last summer has just been given a release date. It’ll go out on the 17th August. It’s called The Wedding Video and I’ll be tweeting the shit out of it nearer the time, but it’s ultra fucking exciting, mainly because people at the test screenings have really really dug it, and I’m hoping you do too. I have, of late wanted to do things that are less bitter – and The Wedding Video certainly is.


So, having been up to Newcastle to run it in, the play that I’m in called ‘Utopia’ is now in residency at The Soho Theatre. Reviews have been mixed, but it seems to me that young, smart people really seem to be getting heaps from it, whereas people who like their plays a bit less experimental lose patience with it pretty quick. Anyway, here are some good reviews. What? Well, I’m obviously not going to point you at the bad ones, am I?

Now the other, staggering thing is this. I’m going to be playing the role of Francis Henshall in the touring production of One Man, Two Guv’nors. More details to follow, but suffice to say I am on the permanent verge of utter bowel emptiment with excitement. I really don’t know how this has happened, but by god, I’m going to work my tits off to make this the very best it can be. It’s a phenomenal show and deserves nothing but my best, my all. So, that’s what I’m going to give it.


I recently made friends with the good people of Triumph. For those of you unaware (been under a rock, have we?) Triumph are a real success story in the often dismal world of British engineering. They have a brilliant sense of their history and they make motorcycles that make parts of me twitch. So, when they found out that I felt like this, they asked me to host the music stage at Triumph Live. It’s happening 31st August – 2nd September, and alongside loads of cool motorbikey things, Reef and The Kaiser Chiefs are playing. Bikers – especially ones that own Triumphs – are brilliant folk, so if you fancy a beery, dancey, laughy, brilliant weekend you can grab tickets here.



I love MarioKart. I have done since I was 13. Nintendo asked me if I’d front up their inter-generational MarioKart Tournament “Britains Fastest Family“. Then they showed me the ACTUAL FRICKING LEAF CUP. I wept. So, obviously, I’m doing it. More deets here. If you’re like me, and have basically bought every Nintendo console on the strength of the fact there’ll be new MarioKart circuits to master, then find a younger/older member of your family and enter. That cup could be yours (oh, and you can also win a car, but like, seriously, THE ACTUAL LEAF CUP!).




7 responses

27 06 2012

Great stuff, hope it’s all a Great success.

27 06 2012
Michelle McCabe

The link for Britain’s Fastest Family isn’t working. I know my husband and son would love it if I can get details. πŸ™‚

3 07 2012
27 06 2012

You lost me at Mariokart, but the rest sounds fantastic πŸ™‚

12 07 2012

The actual Leaf Cup? Just checked out your link… OMG.
Shame there’s no Liverpool qualifiers or me, the mrs and my boys would be there. Instead we’ll have to stick to playing on the Wii every weekend…

Not so bad… :’-(

12 07 2012

Reblogged this on CJ Moseley's Reblog Blog.

3 09 2012

Rufus, my dear.. As you admit to shamelessly promoting your (let’s face it) shameless awesome work.. Have a word with the folk at Ents 24, cos none of the brilliant stuff you mention has been flagged. I speak as one who brought the boyf to see you participate in a “panel game” alongside “dobby” from Peep Show (who’s real name escapes me) at the Leicester Square Theatre some months ago. Frankly the format and the turnout, for that matter, was appalling – but it was money well spent to see you! We had a randomly fun evening, just cos you laughed along with us at the hilarity of how awful the experience couldve been had it not been for your participation. Didn’t know u had a dvd, but shall purchase as my contribution to your household bills.. And to say a big warm-hearted thank you for not wasting my Β£20 surprise date nite. Muchos love and respect.. I think ur birthday present was just beautiful, in execution and sentiment. What a lucky man you are x

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